If Covid-19 has done anything for me, it has shown me just how isolated a life I have. Nothing has changed for me since the pandemic hit our planet. And I’m okay with that.
If the UPS driver didn’t show up wearing a mask over his mouth, I wouldn’t know anything was different. I don’t go out to eat. I don’t go around to stores. I shop online. I bike and hike for entertainment. I haven’t stepped foot into a movie theater in many years. I don’t get visitors, except for an occasional business consultation or transaction. The pandemic keeps me from going to work everyday, but I’m used to that anyhow. And, I don’t bother with the news.
My life consists of inward thoughts and imagination. I don’t desire companionship and don’t feel the need to be around people all the time. And I don’t mind that those opportunities don’t present themselves to me. If it weren’t for an occasional phone call, I could go days without speaking.
Years ago, when I worked in broadcasting, a coworker used to tease me about my reclusive disposition. He always told me that I reminded him of a character in a book he read, the Secret Life of Walter Mitty by
I saw that I frequently used imagination and fantasy as an escape. It’s a powerful and addictive instrument for those who are unhappy with their lives. I’ve outgrown tripping over my turned in feet and I can give presentations in front of large groups with only a slight stammer here and there, but the memories of when those issues crippled me are just as vivid and strong as when I was going through them as a child. And even today, kids point and laugh at my bulgy eyes and awkward under-bite that makes my face look flat, but I shrug it off.
In the story, the Secret Life of Walter Mitty, the main character learns that he can actually go out and do the things he fantasized about. I wish it was that easy, but after all, It’s just a story. Besides, earning a college degree, going on dates, getting a good paying job, having kids, living in a nice house are all over-rated. The solitude life of a hermit can be very rewarding.
So, back to reality. Maybe I can’t go out and live my fantasies, but I can write about them. So, that’s my way out. Or in, depending how you want to look at it. So, now you know why I want to write.
#JeffreyDMontanye #SelfPublishing
Just another exercise about how to express your deepest feelings in writing.
Story and Photo by Jeffrey David Montanye
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